Thursday, August 16, 2012

Friendly Hello and Update...

Hello Family and Friends,
With my recent life events, I made promises to each and every one of you that I would keep you all informed on what is going on with me.  I know you all would like a personal phone call to keep you in the loop with everything happening.  However, I have been so overwhelmed and stressed out, and let's be honest we don't exactly have a small family!!    Frantz wireless runs better than my Verizon wireless does at times, so I know if I missed someone you all are great in getting the needed information in the correct hands.  I am sorry to anyone I forgot to include, if you find I missed someone please let me know.
You are all fully aware I was recently diagnosed with Cervical Cancer.  I have my first appointment with my Oncologist Dr. Matthew Borst, MD on August 27th at 11:00am.  I am very much looking forward to meeting with Dr. Borst, since I have heard nothing but wonderful things about him and his whole team.  I was assured by many health care professional MD's, DO's, NP's and even his very own patients that he is the BEST OF THE BEST!!! I know I am in good hands.  I can't really answer many of your questions right now.  All I know is what little information I have been given.  I went in to see my OB/GYN due to some complications I was having with my IUD.  I was told many times the complications I was having was due to the IUD and it was normal.  After the fourth visit to my doctor for the same complications they found an "angry bump" on my cervix.  (No lie, that is what she called it) I went in a week later for a biopsy on the cervix when she found several more "angry bumps".  After waiting two agonizing weeks, it was finally time to get the results.  I know this may sound crazy but for some reason I had this bad feeling in the back of my head, or gut or wherever that it wasn't going to be good news. I kept telling myself it wasn't Cancer, but all along I just had that bad feeling.  Thank goodness for my mom and Scott for going with me to get the results.  I will never forget the feeling I had when my doctor walked in the room with two sheets of paper that held the answer to the question I had been waiting so long for. There is no easy way to put this kind of news, and I know it can't possibly be easy for a doctor to have to deliver it to anyone at any stage in their life. When she said it was Cancer, at that moment I stopped listening. My whole world seemed to fall apart.  She took five biopsy samples from different parts of my cervix, and all five came back positive for Cancer.  She said she sent them off to a lab here in Arizona and when they confirmed it was Cancer, that lab then sent it off to a specialized lab in New York that again confirmed the same results. She said she called right away to get me an appointment with Dr. Borst.  The soonest appointment he had was August 27th at 11am.  I was thinking here we go again another two week wait to get more answers.  My amazing PCP Dr. Rodarte assured me two weeks to see Dr. Borst was outstanding, he is usually so hard to get into see she was shocked my GYN was able to get me in this soon.  She herself even called to see if she could get me in sooner, and is still calling every day to see if they have any cancelations, or can get me in sooner.  Upon walking out of the office at the end of my appointment, I lost it.  Hugging mom tossed me over the edge.  Seeing her so upset, upset me.  I am sure seeing me so upset, upset her.  She came down for the day, just to go with me to the appointment.  Scott asked her to stay, but as we all know how stubborn she is, (this is where I get my stubbornness from) she declined and said she needed to get on the road and get home.  I started making phone calls.  I called each one of you.  The hardest thing I have ever had to do in my life thus far, is to deliver this kind of news to my loved ones.  Now I know how my doctor must have felt delivering it to me.
Since my OB/GYN isn't specialized in anything but Obstetrics and Gynecology any further questions were out of her scope of practice, but she answered as best she could.  She did say I will have to have a surgery.  What that means exactly I can't say.  When will that be, I can't answer that either. I will have more answers for you all when I see my Oncologist on Monday the 27th.  I don't know how advanced it is, or how aggressive it is.  I don't know what my treatment plan will be or even treatment options.  I can promise you when I know, you all will know.   Like I said earlier in this LONG email of mine, that we have a big family; It is going to be easiest for me to keep you all informed on what the doctors say and what is going on with me that I put it all in an email and send it out.  It's so hard and emotional to make the same phone call 100 times over, answering the same questions you all have, the same questions I have. I do apologize now if anyone is offended, or gets offended by my communicating through email.  It's not my intentions, it's just what is easiest for me.  My emails go right to my phone as well to my computer, so please feel free to email me anytime for any reason! :)
I appreciate each and every one of you. 
I love you with all my heart,
Tanya Nicole Johnson

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